What a difficult week. Not in terms of stress, or lack of sleep, just in other general terms. Poor dad, he's got kidney stones, and my brother's struggling with another weekly crisis of identity. I think it's times like this I really wish I could drive. It would make things easier, and relieve some of the burden on dad. I think the only upside to it is that the report I've got to do for this week is only a letter, though there will be a full presentation to do. I've got to get started on that.
Today, I slept in super late. It was glorious. I spent all day just writing, and watching movies. I ended up watching the Other Boleyn Girl. It wasn't exactly a phenomenal movie, but it is inspiring in its own way. It really does show the power a woman can hold over someone... who knew that sex was such a motivating factor? How lucky, for us, to be psychologically more plastic in terms of our needs. Meaning... if we want it, we won't go through extreme measures to get it. I mean, the greatest art on this planet is typically dedicated to a woman, or is done in the name of getting a woman. I suppose this is supposed to be comforting. To know that all it takes is a little lust to get anything you want. I don't know, it makes me feel a little uncomfortable. After having used those kinds of wiles to my advantage all of last summer, I only found how empty things felt at the end of the day. The only guys that ever managed to really catch my attention were the ones who were immune to such things. Chasing the unattainable. Is it honest attraction, or just me being just... well, wanting someone that I can't have. Who knows? All that matters, I guess, is that if I'm willing to put aside happiness, I'll be able to get anything I want. But isn't that the case for anything, not just men?
I've made almond jello, and it's setting in the fridge, though I was a little sad to find out that there's no fruit cocktail to go along with it. I could try making something else to go along with it, like strawberries, orange and pineapple, though I suspect it wouldn't be as nice as the traditional. I'm thinking of making orange-walnut-almond salad for lunch at work tomorrow, which hopefully be enough. I'm trying to get off eating as much meat as I do. I mean... protein comes from other courses too. Hopefully the walnuts and almonds will do the trick. Must stay on this stupid diet! It's getting warmer every week, though today you would never know. It's so grey. I would have liked it if it had rained though. Maybe it will later tonight? I'm hoping to read on the couch with a pot of tea. I'm loving this new Rufus Wainwright phase. I miss this kind of moving music. Tomorrow's going to be a new week. We'll see how it goes!
